So today I’m headed to beautiful Boise, Idaho. It’s a short flight, about an hour in the air. Not bad right? I don’t fly much so I always check and double check and triple check that I have what I need. I also like to be early and don’t really like to just be on time. Being late is not an option!

I left the house on time and checked my bag rather quickly, surprisingly. Then the TSA security check line!?!  (By the way, I usually avoid checking bags. I would rather pack light if it means not having to check a bag but I’m traveling with tools and unfortunately they frown upon carrying on power drills, long sharp saw blades and various other cutting implements.) But, I digress…

So the line…it was really long. No, it was extremely long. I could not even see the security personnel or the fun “blow up your skirt” machines. I mean it was long! I overheard other passengers saying things like, “Is this normal?” and “I’ve never seen it this long before”. Did I mention the line was long?

I’m sure that most of you have heard the headlines, “TSA Not Well Liked” (to put it nicely). Some people bitch about slow lines, unreasonable restrictions or grumpy TSA agents, but that’s not been my experience, today or any other time that I have traveled. I’m not saying that I like all of the regulations or even think the restrictions are reasonable, but in my experience TSA agents have always been kind, respectful and professional. The lines move quickly and if I have prepared in the way that the TSA and the airlines have instructed, getting through security is a breeze. Here are some of Tony’s tips:

1. Take all items out of your pockets and put them in a small bag. I use an old microphone bag. It has a zipper so things don’t fall out. This keeps my important things like keys, wallet and phone in a safe place that is easy to find after going through security. I do this well before getting to the X-ray machines.
2. Travel light. Don’t bring excess items like keys, change and toddlers. I leave the stuff I don’t need at home or in the car, stashed out of sight. *DISCLAIMER* Leaving toddlers in the car is not recommended or endorsed.
3. Avoid phrases like “You da bomb”, “I hate those *bleeping* TSA agents” and “I hope the plane don’t crash!”.
4. Always smile, be friendly, treat others as you want to be treated and have a good attitude. We’re all trying to get someplace. My mother would be so proud.

Even though the line was long it moved quickly. There were agents along the way to remind travelers of the rules.

“Please remove your shoes, belts and all objects from your pockets. All laptops must be removed from bags and cases. Liquids must be in a clear ziplock bag and less than 3 oz containers. Have a nice day”.

Although I was a little panicked when I first saw the security line I made it to the gate with 24 minutes to spare, even with a stop for an iced mocha on the way. All went well and the TSA did a magnificent job. It was a pretty painless experience. It’s a little like going to the dentist for a routine cleaning: it’s not a fun experience; not part of my “perfect day” (I’ll write about that sometime), but I’m glad to have clean and healthy teeth, and clean and safe air travel.

Another thing about flying is that awkward question: “Do I speak to the person next to me or don’t I?”. Some people have the theory that you don’t speak unless spoken to. In the past I have gone with that, but today I broke through my insecurities and was pleasantly surprised.

Melody is a kind woman with a good sense of humor. She is recently divorced and enjoying freedom from an abusive relationship. She has three kids under the age of 7 and plans to go back to school to become a special education teacher. She has moved back to Idaho to be close to family. She’s traveling from Portland after a beach vacation with some close friends.

That’s all I learned. It was only a 57 minute flight, after all.

Cheers!

P.S. Some of you might be thinking, “Did you make it to Boise?”. “Did your plane crash?”. “Were you killed?”. “Why the *bleep* were you going to Boise? It’s a wonderful city. Full of fun, excitement and beautiful people, but why?”

I did make it (That’s actually a prediction, because as I type this I am still in the air. Oh, the beauty of the iPhone and mobile blogging! I have complete faith in the pilots. Do good pilots! Do good!). I am going to Boise for work. Rather anticlimactic, isn’t it?